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The term alcoholic normally conjures up an image of someone who is always drunk, dishevelled and dysfunctional. Someone who is perhaps unemployed and aggressive toward others. However a high functioning alcoholic (HFA), is someone who is able to hold down a job and maintain relationships. An HFA may not realise they have a problem or…

Here is a short excerpt from my latest book,Surviving Other People’s Self Esteem . It is a book about social acceptance and social comparison, and the lengths some people go to just to feel better about themselves by feeling better than you. “BEING OKAY  I feel that as social beings we have a need to connect…

A while ago I crossed paths with an old friend I’ll call Dan I hadn’t seen since we were about eighteen. He was delivering goods to a shop as I was passing. I didn’t recognise him at first as he was wearing glasses and had gone bald, like his dad had before him. He didn’t…

Ever get the feeling you’re no good at what you do? Worry that you’re not breaking a sweat when trying and that someone sooner or later is going to see through you as the fraud that you are? We all have feelings of doubt from time to time but sometimes when we are consistently unable…

What do we mean by dissociation? Often our reality is often shaped by perceptions and beliefs. When these perceptions get a bit disconnected our sense of reality becomes uncertain and even blurred. For example sometimes we may be reading a book and forget what we’ve just read. Other times we may be having a conversation…

The book ‘When it’s Him‘ is available now on Kindle through Amazon. It is a short book for men about different types of abuse and how it affects them. Please click on the link to take you to it. #whenitshim #abusedmen

When we think of obsessive compulsive disorder, or OCD as it is commonly known as, we often think of patterns of obsessive thoughts. These thoughts are usually associated with an intense fear of something dreadful happening. The compulsions that follow usually involve some kind of ritual to try to prevent the dreadful thing happening. For…

Emotional neglect differs from emotional abuse. Abuse normally involves doing something to someone else that causes some kind of harm. This could be for example name calling. Neglect may involve failure of say a parent to show a level of attention or affection to provide emotional well-being to a child. Emotional neglect also takes place…

Abuse is all about control and manipulation, but what is meant by ‘reactive abuse’? Imagine a relationship where one person is abusive towards the other. However what if the abuser claimed to be the victim and blamed the other for being abusive towards them in the way they react and respond? Click to view my video…