Tag archive: attachment

    Deep at our very core is a need to feel significant to someone. When we feel significant to someone who is significant to us there’s no feeling like it. Our heart skips a beat when we see the other person. We fantasize about them, we can’t take our eyes off them. We are fixated on…

    A while ago I crossed paths with an old friend I’ll call Dan I hadn’t seen since we were about eighteen. He was delivering goods to a shop as I was passing. I didn’t recognise him at first as he was wearing glasses and had gone bald, like his dad had before him. He didn’t…

    Fear of intimacy is not just the fear of romance or sex. It can be a fear of our connection to others. According to attachment theory infants who are not held, nurtured, encouraged and supported have difficulty thriving. Fear of intimacy could be because we have a fear of being abandoned, rejected or betrayed emotionally….

    Early attachment research has found that attachment patterns established in childhood can lead to a number of different outcomes. For example, children who are securely attached as infants tend to develop stronger self-esteem and resilience. They also tend to be more independent, develop relationships, and experience less depression and anxiety. British Psychologist John Bowlby described attachment as,…

    Children with an avoidant attachment tend to avoid parents and other caregivers.  This avoidance can intensify after a long period of absence. The children may not reject attention from a parent or other significant figure, but they don’t actively seek contact. Often children with an avoidant attachment show no preference between a parent and a stranger. Adults…

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