Ideas for a Happy New Year

We often think in terms of being happier when we have more of what we like or less of what we don’t like. As we reflect on the past year with all it brought we think of what will make us happier. So with a new year often comes new resolutions. Have you ever noticed how these resolutions tend to involve stopping doing one thing and start doing another? We believe most of these resolutions will bring us happiness and success. Beliefs such as if I stop smoking then I’ll feel healthier, and if I feel healthier I’ll feel happier. Have you noticed also how short lived some of these resolutions are? Some of these resolutions are hard to stick to.

Here are a few ideas for things to stop doing to improve our happiness as we enter into a new year.

Firstly stop judging everyone and everything. When we criticise we can be constructive and supportive towards improvement. When criticism is constant and without anything constructive being offered it feels more like judgement. No one likes to feel judged. It’s pointing out the shortcomings of others and not paying attention to our own areas for development. Perhaps try seeing others as different, not better or worse than you. Perhaps try accepting these differences and respecting them. You would of course expect the same from others towards you.

Stop trying to impress others with how clever and successful you are. Real friends are more interested in you as a person, not how sarcastic you are, how clever you are or how fast your car is. Notice how much better you feel when your relationships be based on mutual respect and support and not one-upmanship.

When we moan, whinge and complain we tend to become like an emotional vacuum cleaner, sucking all the joy out of a room as you blame the world for your poor choices. Stop blaming others for your mistakes and bad choices and stop dwelling on mistakes from the past. Take ownership and responsibility and notice how empowering it can be. Rather than fixating on the problems and the outcomes of your decisions try thinking in a solution focused way. What have I learned from this? What would make this better? How would I like things to be?

These are just a few ideas to think about improving happiness in the new year. Not just your own but even the happiness of those around you. Happy new year.

Tags: criticism, happiness, judgement, relationships