Life Experiences and Communication
Our life experiences and communication skills are linked. How we communicate, how we perceive, our attitudes have been shaped by our life experiences and from our significant others such as parents, older siblings, friends, teachers, clergy etc. For example we may have grown up in an environment where sex was a taboo subject so we get anxious and embarrassed about sex. Or maybe anger was something to be suppressed so we end up turning it inwards and never expressing ourselves, becoming depressed and passive aggressive.
Devaluing phrases like, ‘get over it’, suck it up’, ‘dry your eyes’, grow a pair’ from significant others in our lives often leave us reluctant to express feelings or emotions later on in life which lead to further personal difficulties. When we feel anger in these situations we tend to either explode and lash out destructively or internalize and blame ourselves.
Counselling can provide a safe place where you won’t feel judged or criticized, a place where you can explore what you are really feeling and learn to express it in a more honest, constructive and assertive way. For example confrontation does not have to be aggressive and adversarial. It can be a positive move towards change, open a line of communication which was previously not there. It can improve a relationship and open up many new opportunities.
Anger can be a perfectly justifiable thing to feel in a given situation. In counselling you can learn what triggers the anger, what lies behind it and learn to express it more appropriate way, at the right time and at the right person.
.If you feel you would benefit from counselling or if you would like more information contact Sentient Counselling in Belfast
This article was written by sentientcounselling