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I was having coffee with an old friend when we got talking about how our minds tend to sometimes wander off in directions, sometimes at the expense of the here and now. So just a thought for today I’d like to share with you following our conversation.  She said to me, “Sometimes we feel sad…

Continuing from yesterday here are the other 6 irrational beliefs from Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy (REBT).   6. The belief that avoidance is easier than to facing lifes difficulties Instead avoidance is usually much harder in the long run. 7. The belief that we need something stronger or greater than ourselves on which to rely Instead of the idea…

According to Rational Emotive Behavioural Therapy (REBT) we have 12 irrational beliefs that can cause us distress. The first five are: 1. The belief that it is a necessity for adults to be loved by significant others for almost everything they do. Instead of concentrating on our own self-respect,on loving rather than on being loved. 2. The belief that certain acts…

We grieve when a loved one dies. It’s a perfectly normal and natural emotional response to loss. However grief is not just ‘sadness’. It is often a progression of different emotions such as shock, anger, anxiety, numbness etc. The grieving process, in which many emotions are experienced can take days, weeks, months or years. Some people may experience…

A narcissistic personality is usually characterized by a pattern of grandiosity, either in fantasy or behavior. There is also an overwhelming need for admiration. Most strikingly however is a complete lack of empathy toward other people. Narcissists usually believe they are of great importance in everybody’s life while displaying disdainful and patronizing attitudes towards others and their experiences, needs etc….

Fear of intimacy is not just the fear of romance or sex. It can be a fear of our connection to others. According to attachment theory infants who are not held, nurtured, encouraged and supported have difficulty thriving. Fear of intimacy could be because we have a fear of being abandoned, rejected or betrayed emotionally….

It seems to me these days we live in a society where finding someone to blame is more important than finding ways to put things right. It has become the blame culture. I guess if we find a cause then we’re letting ourselves off the hook. So if everything is everyone else’s fault then how…

Always being anxious, always worrying and assuming the worst will happen can impact negatively on your jobs, choices, relationships and can stop you living your life in a full and healthy way. If you want to change anxious thinking to a style that’s less distressing or upsetting into a way of thinking that’s more realistic…

A verbal abuser has the same underlying issues of control and domination as any other kind of abuser. Abusers generally feel happier if they make someone doubt themselves or back down. Then they behave as if nothing has happened as they feel more in control. Verbal abuse comes in a myriad of forms, and although some…