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    Early attachment research has found that attachment patterns established in childhood can lead to a number of different outcomes. For example, children who are securely attached as infants tend to develop stronger self-esteem and resilience. They also tend to be more independent, develop relationships, and experience less depression and anxiety. British Psychologist John Bowlby described attachment as,…

    When is the right time for couple counselling? Knowing when is the right time to go to counselling is one thing, knowing when as a couple can be difficult to gauge. Here are some pointers as to what may be going on in the relationship which may help you decide if now is a good…

    Accepting change can be difficult at times, particularly if it’s change for the worst, for example change involving loss such as bereavement or redundancy. It can maybe feel like failing at something like a job, a relationship etc. Accepting something different means having to accept you’re not the person you used to be. You’re no…

    There are many different defusion techniques to reduce stressful and tense situations. We have different ways of managing our interactions and responses in order to alleviate heightened emotions. One way to defuse unhelpful, distressing and self-defeating thoughts is to step back and look at them for what they really are, not what we believe they are….

    At the core of Acceptance and Commitment Therapy (ACT) is the belief that there are somethings in our lives we can change, control or manage and there are some things that we can’t. It is accepting the things that we cannot change, that are not in our control and committing to a course of action…

    Personalizing feedback and criticism can often lead to all sorts of difficulties with our self concept, esteem and confidence. We can sometimes end up feeling anxious, and even constructive criticism can feel like harsh judgement if we take it the wrong way. It can damage our relationships if we filter what’s being said to us a particular…

    I think it’s fair to say we don’t like to be blamed for things. Worse still if we’re innocent of any wrong doing or if someone is ascribing motives to us that are inaccurate. Yet blaming others is something we ourselves tend to when things go awry. Calling someone an idiot or telling them they never get…

    Atychiphobia is the fear of being wrong, or rather the fear of being told we’re wrong. It can be one of the most debilitating emotional conditions we could ever experience.  Understanding this fear, and where it impacts you can help towards challenging and addressing it. See my Youtube video on atychiphobia The fear of being wrong can manifest itself…

    Here are some tips which some people find helpful in overcoming social phobia / anxiety. Prepare to relax – imagine a tense situation whilst relaxing in a hot bath, or listening to soothing music. Learn to let go Focus on your surroundings – to help take the focus off yourself. How many windows are there? What…

    So why counselling? Why Now? Once in a while life gets on top of us. We get disappointed, frustrated and angry. But if we feel stuck, hurt, or depressed and alone over a long period of time then something could be wrong and we may need help.  Many issues, experiences and difficulties we have cause us to fear we…

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